Music is my Therapy

Song: Curtains Artist: Ed Sheeran I was this close 🤏 to sending  these lyrics to my sister when she reached out asking if I was OK when I wasn't:  "Are you alright? Maybe, don't ask.  'Cause you know I never like to talk about that.  Keep it inside, yeah, you say I always hold back."  But I didn't. I didn't because "I keep quiet, so the ones around me don't know t hat the mountain feels so steep." I wonder what would have happened if I had. What would she have thought? How would she have responded? But there's so much going on right now in my family's life, I didn't want to add more stress.  I've been having a hard summer. I'm super depressed and I don't know how to get out of it. I need help. I need to "pull the curtains back and see the sunshine." Free myself from this darkness. Climb out of this hole. I don't. I won't . I feel like I can't. But I want to. I want to feel, be, get better. Thi...

Song(s): I'm Ready  &  Boat Artist(s):   Hanson & Ed Sheeran It's a two song kinda month.  First up, Hanson. Because it's Hanson month. And this is one of my new life anthems/theme songs. I want to feel   Ready.   Ready to overcome my fears. Ready to open up and get help.  Ready to move forward and start living.  This song makes me feel like I am...or at least that I can be. The uplifting message of the lyrics and swelling feel of the music, gives me a boost of courage and peace each time I listen to it. "I’m ready for, the barriers to come down." 👊💪🌻✨ Unfortunately I can't share the song in it's entirety due to the fact that it's a Member's EP song. But, this small clip does include my favorite verse and Taylor sounds 😍😍 What are you waiting for? Join Hnet today so you too can listen to this song feel READY to take life by the reins!  I’m living, on borrowed time Little by little, I buy just a little, to ease my mind I’...

Today is Memorial Day. A day I spend remembering. Remembering my loved ones who have passed. This one hits hard. It's my second Memorial day remembering my grandma and my sweet puppy dog and best friend . 🖤🤍💔 It's the first one since my grandpa's death . And my neighbors dogs death who very much felt like my own. 💔 I miss them all terribly. Especially right now. As summer officially begins. Summertime is always nostalgic for me. It reminds me of the carefree days of childhood. My early morning walks with my dog. The BBQ's and cookouts that my grandpa always loved. Watching fireworks at my grandma's house. Babysitting "my little girl" and watching "my" second dog while the family went on summer vacation. The quotes above are dedicated to ALL of my loved ones now gone...but these next ones are specifically for the greatest and hardest loss of all, my sweet angel and best friend in the world. The one who's death still hurts the most. The o...

I've been TERRIBLE at blogging during Hanson month!! 😩 There's been a lot going on...stay tuned for an update...but I couldn't let May slip by without giving a review of Hanson's 2023 Member EP Ambient . It's beautiful and unique and 100% Hanson and I've been really enjoying it! I wouldn't say this tops White Rabbit ... but it's still a really solid EP! I'M READY - My FAVORITE track from Ambient. It immediately made me think of Running by NF (since NF is all I was listening to up until now, haha. I've had his HOPE album on repeat!). It's the perfect follow-up song. Hanson, as always, encourages positivity and belief in oneself, which is where NF is headed. And is where I am trying to get to. It's so beautiful! This song is a new theme song for me as I try to "begin again." Reset my life. Start Over. Take new risks and challenge myself to live more fully. It's such a good song! 💜🙌😭  Favorite line(s): "Well I’...

Song: HAPPY Artist: NF This song hit me so  personally the first time I heard it and I have been obsessively listening to it ever since. I couldn't help but relate to the chorus after having just experienced such similar thoughts not a week before. "I don't think I'm capable of being truly happy." I remember thinking those words to myself as I sat in a beautiful place, surrounded by people I love. It broke my heart. 💔 The thumbnail of this video, with that little girls sad face, hurts to see because I see so much of myself in her. I haven't been able to listen to this song all the way through without getting choked up and emotional.  I finally opened up to my parents about the depression and sadness I've been feeling. Like the girl does at the end of the video, when she shows up at her mom's house, it's a first step. I wish I could have shared this song with them but I don't know how they would take it. It would probably make them feel sad. I...

Song: What A Wonderful World Artist: Louie Armstrong HAPPY EARTH DAY ! ! 🌎🌹🌻⛅🌈 I don't know why I wanted to post a song in honor of today's silly little holiday, but it's been a tradition the past two years ( If Ever - 2021   & Earth Song - 2022 ) and I decided to keep it going 😜 The weather has been whack around these parts all week but it's definitely starting to feel more and more like spring and that's exciting! I hope with the warmer weather, I'll start feeling better emotionally and mentally. Maybe. There's a lot of stressful things I need to get figured out, including just trying to get out of this horrible depression I've been feeling stuck in.  I'm going to try to get myself to go outside today and enjoy some fresh air, rain or sunshine, I've been cooped up indoors for too long. I always have loved being outdoors and I live in a beautiful area. This was the first song that came to mind when I thought "What's a good ...

TODAY IS THE DAY I'VE BEEN LIVING FOR!!!  🎉💙👊 SOOOOO EXCITED to FINALLY be listening to and reacting to NF'S NEW ALBUM HOPE!!!   This came out last Friday, two days after I snagged tickets to see him LIVE on tour this summer!! Since I was out of town on vacation with my family, I decided to wait and listen to the album, top to bottom, start to finish when I had uninterrupted time to myself so I could dissect every lyric, sound, vibe and feeling and most likely shed a few tears. AND THAT DAY HAS FINALLY COME!! STARTING NOW!!  LET'S GOOOOOOOO!!!   👊🙌🙏✊🔥 I'm weirdly nervous...IDK why! 😅  HOPE - SEE MY REACTION HERE! This song still goes so hard and gets me in the feels  every single time !  Especially the ending! 🔥😭👊 I'm still battling FEAR and his voice is loudest in my head ( "You'll never evolve... We are not enough... You don't have the heart, you don't have the strength, y ou don't have the will, you don't have the faith...