Music is my Therapy

Song:  The Holly and the Ivy Artist: King College Cambridge  MERRY WEEK OF CHRISTMAS ! ! 🎄🎅🌟 Wow. Christmas will be here so soon! I'm out of time...I have only so many days to wear so many Christmas sweaters, finish watching all the Christmas movies, listening to Christmas music, etc. It's a little stressful but I've also been happy with what I've done so far, so I'm going to calm down. And allow these next three days to just be. Live in the moment. Don't stress and rush so much. My shopping is done. Neighbor and friend gifts have been given. It's time to just... be. Let myself relax a little and take in the season. Today was the Christmas service at church. It was nice although I didn't love the remarks of the last speaker, it felt a little condemning and then they just threw in Jesus; I don't know, it was weird. Not exactly the "Christmasy" message I was hoping for. But that doesn't matter. The music was beautiful and I got chok...

Song: O Holy Night Artist: Pentatonix Yesterday's song was....actually so weird. 😬 What was I thinking!? Sorry about that...😅 Today I'm sharing O Holy Night by Pentatonix,  TWO ways! Their original version from clear back in 2012 (🤯) and their STUNNING version from just last year. Please enjoy and may it bring you the peace and comfort you may be seeking, something we could all use a little bit more of.  2012 2023 THE PASSION ! 😍😭💓

Song: Be Not Always Artist: The Jacksons Don't have a lot of time to put a post up so I had to choose something random and quick to share. This song is simple but the message is profound. It's from the Jackson's Victory album and has a shockingly different vibe from everything else on the album. It's really, really beautiful, tender and also a little solemn. It's a cry for peace and that the cycles of war, poverty, discrimination, hate, etc. will "be not always." 🙏 It's a perfect, pleading, "prayer-like" song that always feels so fitting this time of year. Always Be not always And if always Bow our heads in shame Always Please be not always And if always Bow our heads in blame 'Cause time has made promises Just promises Faces Did you see their faces? Did they touch you? Have you felt such pain? To have nothing To dream something Then lose hoping Is not life but lame? But time has made promises Just promises Mothers cry, babies die Help...

Song: He Prepares A Way Artist: Angie Killian & Blake Gillette As always....I'm in need of a re-set. And Sundays always feel like a good day to do so. Heard this song performed at church today. It was beautiful. I need to get back to the basics. I need to read my scriptures and put more time and thought into my prayers. I need to exercise faith and follow the example of Jesus Christ and keep the covenants I have made with Him more fully and honestly. I need to trust in His word and promises. He led Lehi and Sariah  To the promised land He gave light to Jared’s brother With His outstretched hand He heard and answered Enos Shielded Samuel on the wall Freed Amulek and Alma When He made their prison fall He prepares a way When we follow Him I’ll walk with faith And trust His light within My star in the sky My compass, my guide He prepares a way For me He gave power and protection To Abinadi Nurtured Helaman’s two-thousand At their mothers’ side He lifted Alma’s burdens Aided Abish...

Song: Hard Fought Hallelujah  Artist: Brandon Lake I'm not feeling super inspired musically at the moment. Perhaps it's due to the fact that I'm starving after a long day of work (long, but really good day 🙏), or the fact that I'm still experiencing major withdrawals from my Hanson concerts 😭 Why do they have to be so good?? Like, it would help if they were not just as good live (if better) or maybe didn't have the most perfect setlists, covers, voices and gave it their ALL every single time that your left with a permanent grin on your face, floating on a cloud in a state of utter euphoria...that might help 😉 I guess I'll settle with the fact that my favorite band is actually the very BEST so I'm just going to have to deal until the next time I get to see them live (or at least hear them perform via livestream....🎄🙏🤞). This song popped up on my youtube feed the other day (how many times have I referenced finding songs via youtube?? I guess I spen...

Song: Dive Artist: Steven Curtis Chapman It's re-set Sunday!  I'm trying to re-commit myself more fully to Christ. I want to be all in! I truly believe it will change my life if I choose Him over everything else. I heard this song on an Instagram reel recently and a wave of nostalgia rushed over me...and I don't even remember how I know the song! 😂 But it's a jam (if a bit dated and cheesy 😉😆) and I love it! Feel good, poppy sounding music with a message focused on Jesus, it's perfect! 💖 The long awaited rains Have fallen hard upon the thirsty ground And carved their way to where The wild and rushing river can be found And like the rains I have been carried here to where the river flows, yeah My heart is racing and my knees are weak as I walk to the edge I know there is no turning back once my feet have left the ledge And in the rush I hear a voice That's telling me it's time to take the leap of faith So here I go I'm diving in I'm going deep In...

Song: We Don't Talk About Bruno Artist: From, Disney's Encanto Had to keep things lighter today because of the Sabbath and this beautiful Conference weekend. I love our Latter-Day Prophet President Russell M. Nelson. 💗 At 100 (!) years old he is still so sharp, eloquent and well spoken. Truly the sweetest, most humble, faithful man. I enjoyed getting to hear from him today; his words filled my heart with peace and the desire to do and be better. To remember my Savior daily and re-commit my life to him through my thoughts, words and actions. This song has already become a Disney classic! My family of all adults (besides my nieces and nephew) love this song and movie! I kid you not, there have been times where there have been no children present on a road trip and we are jammin' to this song! 😂 What can I say? We're nerds! Disney is for everyone... the young and the young at heart 💚 And the song totally fits in on this Halloween playlist...Bruno has a very mysterious...

Song: The Gift of Tears Artist: Isaac Hanson This song spoke to my heart and soul this month. Isaac is going full  gospel  and I'm here for it! 👏 You can  feel  his heart on this track, he is singing from the very depths of his soul! "And when all hope is dead and gone... Pray on"  💓🙏 What a beautiful night for a wedding Between your heart and your soul It's a beautiful time for new beginnings Moving on, breaking free and letting go Have you ever been caught in a nightmare? Have you ever been trapped in a dream? Take a deep breath, close your eyes Open your heart and let love inside 'Cause the gift of tears will calm your fears And when all hope is dead and gone Pray on, oh pray on What a beautiful day to remember Who you were when you were young and naive Shooting for the moon Strumming out of tune Just a crazy kid born to believe Have your demons become your guardian angels? Does it feel like you've lost touch with the light? Oh, so take a deep breath, ...

Song: Church Artist: Tom MacDonald & Brandon Hart feat. Nova Rockefellar  This clearly isn't a love song but it's an "expression" song. And I just don't have it in me to look up some lovey-dovey, sappy, sweet, romantic love song right now, not in the headspace I'm in. I've spent my weekend in isolation and self-pity. I've been doing things I'm ashamed of. I've resorted to bad habits and old, unhealthy coping mechanisms. I've given up.... again. It's so disheartening. I feel overwhelmed with shame and guilt.  This song really speaks to me. I know I don't totally relate to the lyrics, as they speak about struggles with alcoholism and drug addiction. But I have my own vices, my own "drugs" if you will that hold me captive. That I know are bad for me, yet I return to them time and time again. Because it makes me feel good,  at least for a little while. But then I'm left with the regret and depression of my actions. I...

Song: Fighter Artist: Tom MacDonald  HAPPY SELF - LOVE VALENTINE'S DAY TO MUAH ! ! 😊💪🥊💗 I had hoped to have changed enough from last Valentine's Day to now to be in a relationship or at the very least be going on a date....that clearly didn't happen. I'm pretty much exactly "in the same place, r unning in the same race same pace."  It's disappointing and believe me, I could go on a miles long rant about it. But I'm not going to. I'm going to just accept it and move forward in a spirit of "let's this try again!" Today, I'm going to focus on improving myself. Loving myself. 💗 Accepting myself and believing in myself. That's what this song is about. I loved and related to the message and decided that it's going to be my "self-love song" dedicated to ME this Valentine's Day! 💪💗 Let's keep fighting for another day and another year! 🥊 I deserve this!  Bottom of the ninth, up against the odds Ru...

Song: Human Nature Artist: From, MJ: The Musical  BEST. NEWS. EVEEEERRRRRR!!  🙌💗🎉 I feel so humbled and grateful right now! 🙏 I've had a rough start to the year. But, it's ended up being the push I needed in the right direction to open up and start getting help. ( 𝅘𝅥𝅮Some would say having a mental breakdown is a negative thing which on one hand I agree with, o n the other hand, it was the push I needed to get help and start the healing process 𝅘𝅥𝅮 ) I've never felt closer with my parents and finally feel like I have a real, open and honest relationship with them.  I have officially started the process of slowly changing my "career" into something I have wanted for a long time. I'm making small changes with the help and support from my parents that I had felt was lacking for so long. The other night as I was praying and thanking God for all that He has been helping me get through, I still found myself expressing the pain of the struggles I'm still wor...

Song(s): Far, Far Away on Judea's Plains & Once in Royal David's City Artists: Tabernacle Choir & Orchestra at Temple Square Feeling a little...weird about some news I received today. It's nothing serious or scary. Well, it's kinda serious but not in a "bad way." Not really. I mean, selfishly it is. More sad than bad. Anyway, I've just been thrown a loop but I'm trying not to let it bother me right now and enjoy celebrating one more "normal" Christmas...even tho even that's not feeling super normal right now.  Choosing songs to help me focus on the Savior because I'm starting to get overwhelmed and upset. No matter what happens, this part of Christmas will never change.  Far, far away on Judea’s plains, Shepherds of old heard the joyous strains: Glory to God, Glory to God, Glory to God in the highest; Peace on earth, goodwill to men; Peace on earth, goodwill to men! Sweet are these strains of redeeming love, Message of mercy ...

Song: He Shall Reign Forevermore Artist: Matt Maher Not gonna lie, it's late and I need to get a song up and this is one option I had saved so I'm goin' with it! Nothin' fancy, no story behind why or how I discovered the song or what it means to me. I just thought it was a cool song with a good message, especially for Christmas and it's Matt Maher. All good enough reasons for me!  In the bleak midwinter, all creation grown For a world in darkness, frozen like a stone Light is breaking, in a stable for a throne If I were a wise man, I would travel far If I were a shepherd, I would do my part Poor as I am, I will give to Him my heart And He shall reign forevermore, forevermore And He shall reign forevermore, forevermore Unto us a child is born The king of kings, the lord of lords And He shall reign forevermore, forevermore Here within the manger lies The one who builds the starry skies This baby born for sacrifice Christ, our Messiah To our hopes and to our fears Th...

Song:  Mary Did You Know? Artist: Tommee Profitt feat. Jordan Smith When I saw this pop up on my youtube feed I knew I HAD to give it a listen because a) it's a beautiful song and b) Tommee Profitt. Who's Tommee Proffit you ask? Well, he's  just the producer and good friend of the one and only NF himself! So, since I can't really post an NF song during Christmas time...he just doesn't have any that fit the vibes, haha, this is the next best thing, right!? 😉😂 I'm such a nerd! I've only listened to part of it as of now but so far, it's GORGEOUS!! Also, side-note but...Tommee sort of looks like NF, lol. He's skinny and lanky, dressed in all black and wearing a hat (he's the guy at the piano)! No wonder their friends and work so well together! 🤣 Another side-note, Jordan Smith's voice is INCREDIBLE!!! 😍 So much feeling and power!!  Mary did you know that your baby boy Would one day walk on water? Mary did you know that your baby boy Wou...

Song: Processional: O Come, O Come Artist: The Tabernacle Choir at Temple Square & Orchestra I listened to this song as I was getting ready for church today. I really enjoyed it. It is beautiful, moving, spiritual and triumphant! Full of joy in praises or our Lord and King, Savior and Redeemer. I had a good time at church (even if I still only attended sacrament meeting) and am glad I went. I had a difficult weekend, wrestling with feelings of guilt and shame, anger and hostility. But I'm ready to leave all of that behind and move forward this new week in the spirit of Christmas. 🙏🌟  MERRY CHRIST - MAS ! !

In need of some Christmas cheer...so how about another Christmas themed live listening party!? 🎧🎄 Today, I present Mat & Savanna Shaw's A Christmas We'll Remember! I'm excited to give these songs a listen. I've already shared one song from this album a few days ago, so be sure to give it a listen. It's definitely a promising start! As with my Pentatonix listening party from December 1st , whichever song ends up being my favorite will be my "December song" of the day. So, watch for it below!  A Christmas We'll Remember - Already listened/reacted to this one! Still love it!! 🤍 It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas - A pretty, classic rendition. I enjoyed it but wasn't necessarily "wowed" by it per se.  Spending Christmas together - Awww, this was a really sweet original song!! 🥺💗 I liked it. It's definitely got sentimental vibes going on.  I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus - Hahaha, this was a cute sister duet on ...

Song: Glory (Let There Be Peace) Artist: Matt Maher I'm having some serious dejavu to  exactly one year ago today . This is weirdly uncanny. And sad that I'm still struggling with the same things I was a year ago...I'll spare you the details of my difficult morning. Just know, I made some bad choices and was left with the inevitable feelings of guilt and regret that always comes when willingly giving in to temptations.  I felt very hopeless today. I felt numb, like I knew what I was doing was wrong but I didn't care. I tried to repent, but didn't really feel sorry and that upset me while at the same time left me feeling... nothing. I'm so sick and tired of my life. I really don't see much of a future for myself. I allowed myself to get caught up in self-pity. I knew I needed to try and feel the Christmas spirit so I read a small book I recently received entitled The Generous One by President Dieter F. Uchtodorf. It was exactly what I needed and his ending ...

Song: Hark! The Herald Angels Sing Artist: Matt Maher  Matt Maher is BACK! 😁🎉 And his super fun arrangement of Hark! The Herald Angels Sing is awesome!! I love it! This song in general has become a favorite of mine over the years. I love the joyfulness of the lyrics in praise, worship and gratitude for the life of the Savior. I know of several different versions of this song with slightly different verses and I love them all! Every time I sing it, I have a big grin on my face because it's full of so much JOY!! At least for me it is!! Hark, the herald angels sing Glory to the newborn King Peace on earth and mercy mild God and sinners reconciled Joyful, all ye nations rise Join the triumph of the skies With the angelic host proclaim Christ is born in Bethlehem Hark, the herald angels sing Glory to the newborn King Christ by highest heaven adored Christ, the everlasting Lord Late in time, behold Him come Offspring of a Virgin's womb Veiled in flesh the Godhead see Hail the ...

Song: O Come, All You Un faithful Artist: Sovereign Grace Music My sister sent this song into a family group chat. The lyrics speak directly to me, especially since I'm feeling unfaithful and unworthy right now. I allowed my fear, pride and shame to win out once again and skipped going to my church services today. This is the best time of year to go to church and I missed it. I also had some...disturbing dreams last night. The reason they were so disturbing isn't because they were scary nightmares, it was because they felt real. They dealt with actual things I've been struggling with that make me feel very guilty and ashamed. It almost felt like, as I was dreaming, I was also half awake and willingly having those thoughts. I don't know how to explain it but it made me feel gross and also....numb. Like, here I am again, struggling with these same sins and guilt. I'm so used to it at this point I have a hard time feeling just about anything at all. It's hard fo...