CHRISTMAS DAY 2024!

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Song: Christmas Day
Artist: Mat & Savanna Shaw

MERRY CHRISTMAS!! 
🎄🎅🎁🍬🍪🌟🙏

What a fun day!! I loved getting to spend time with my family. It was traditional, new and different all at the same time, but it was still a beautiful, wonderful holiday. Despite not getting ANY snow 😭 I love my family so much it makes me want to cry! I'm so blessed. Even if now, here at the end of the night I'm feeling depressed and sad for the holiday to end. I'm feeling sad for my single aunt who hosted the past two days and then we all left her alone. It makes me feel bad for her 💔 I already feel sad for myself (always, of course) that all of my siblings got to go home with their significant others, but at least I have my parents and dog. My poor, sweet, over the top, but very loving aunt just had to watch everyone leave and was left alone with somewhat of a mess. We'll be back over there tomorrow to help her clean up but still. She put so much work and effort to make it special and fun. I can't imagine how it feels to be all alone after two days of a full house.

I mourn for the past. I can't help it. But I'm looking to this new year with a hope and prayer in my heart that I will find happiness and joy in the future. That I can forgive myself and move on. That I can have someone special next year to sit next to and open gifts with and leave with at the end of the night. That I won't be the one left alone anymore. I love my aunt, but don't want to end up like her. I know that sounds terrible but it's a fear I've had for the past few years and I see it coming true more and more as each year passes and it terrifies me! I wish she could find someone too. It's possible but she's given up. Just like me. Ugh. It's so sad! 

Sorry for the tangent and ranting and pity party. I'm grateful for the fun times and memories made. I love my family and I'm grateful for them. Here's to a new year full of hope and change and acceptance and courage! 

This song is beautiful. 🥂




FOR ONE FINAL TIME....

MERRY, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
AND
A HAPPY NEW YEAR! 🥂

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