30 on the 30th

Song(s): The Words I Would Say, You Love Me Anyway & I Believe It Now

Artist: Sidewalk Prophets feat. Olivia Lane

In lieu of my typical ranting about my depression and how pathetic my life is, here are a few songs I keep listening to trying to force myself to keep going and remember why I'm here. To remind myself that God is really there. That He loves me despite...everything. That I need to believe. I'm desperate. I'm praying for a miracle this new year. 💔🙏

The Words I Would Say

Three in the morning and I'm still awake

So I picked up a pen and a page

And I started writing just what I'd say

If we were face to face

I'd tell you just what you mean to me

Tell you these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord and

Never give up hope

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got his hand on you so

Don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say

Last time we spoke you said you were hurting

And I felt your pain in my heart

I want to tell you that I keep on praying

Love will find you where you are

I know 'cause I've already been there

So please hear these simple truths

Be strong in the Lord and

Never give up hope

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got his hand on you so

Don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

These are the words I would say

From one simple life to another

I will say

Come find peace in the Father

Be strong in the Lord and

Never give up hope.

You're gonna do great things

I already know

God's got his hand on you so

Don't live life in fear

Forgive and forget

But don't forget why you're here

Take your time and pray

Thank God for each day

His love will find a way

These are the words I would say

You Love Me Anyway

The question was raised

As my conscience fell

A silly, little lie

It didn't mean much

But it lingers still

In the corners of my mind

Still You call me to walk

On the edge of this world

To spread my dreams and fly

But the future's so far

My heart is so frail

I think I'd rather stay inside

But You love me anyway

It's like nothing in life that I've ever known

Yes, You love me anyway

Oh, Lord, how You love me

How You love me

It took more than my strength

To simply be still

To seek but never find

All the reasons we change

The reasons I doubt

And why do loved ones have to die?

But You love me anyway

It's like nothing in life that I've ever known

Yes, You love me anyway

Oh, Lord, how You love me

I am a thorn in Your crown

But You love me anyway

I am the sweat from Your brow

But You love me anyway

I am the nail in Your wrist

But You love me anyway

I am Judas' kiss

But You love me anyway

See now, I am the man who yelled out from the crowd

For Your blood to be spilled on this earth shaking ground

Yes then I turned away with the smile on my face

With this sin in my heart tried to bury Your grace

And then alone in the night I still called out for You

So ashamed of my life, my life, my life!

But You love me anyway

Oh, God, how You love me

Yes, You love me anyway

It's like nothing in life that I've ever known

Yes, You love me anyway

Oh, Lord, how You love me

Yes, You love me,

Yes, You love me

Yes, You love me,

Yes, You love me

How You love me

How You love me

How You love me

I Believe It Now

I couldn't see it then, but I believe it now

Just a searching soul tired of reaching out

Stuck on the tracks, train bearing down

Screaming my lungs who will save me now

As the reruns of the regrets, they replay inside my head

Got the Devil on my shoulder, and He's leaving me for dead

Whispers and lies have brought me here

Flooding my veins with doubt and fear

Oh, I

I could not see it then

Oh, I

I could not see

Oh, my God

I remember when I cried

Shook my fists up at the sky

I wondered why

You felt so far from me

Oh, God

It was in my deepest pain

That I heard You call my name

I heard You say

That You were right there with me

I couldn't see it then, but I believe it now

Tryna hold my head up when the ground fell out

I felt all alone even in a crowd

Like a sinking stone dragging my heart down

And the weight of the sorrows I carried on my chest

It kept pulling me under, and I couldn't catch my breath

Not how I thought my life would go

Didn't know my heart could sink this low

No, I

I could not see it then

No, I

I could not see it

Oh, my God

I remember when I cried

Shook my fists up at the sky

I wondered why

You felt so far from me

Oh, God

It was in my deepest pain

That I heard You call my name

I heard You say

That You were right there with me

Love was standing there

Holding me

But I couldn't see

That love was always there

He carried me

And now, I believe

Oh, my God

I know You heard me when I cried

'Cause You were right there by my side

I realized

That You have never left me

Oh, God

It was in my deepest pain

That I heard You call my name

I heard You say

That You were right there with me

I couldn't see it then

But now I believe

I couldn't see it then

But now I believe

(I could not see, now I believe)

But now I believe

(I could not see, now I believe)

Now I believe

(I could not see, now I believe)

(I could not see, now I believe)