Music is my Therapy

Song: Autumn Leaves 🍂 Artist: Ed Sheeran I was sitting outside a few minutes ago. It's a beautiful autumn day. Perfect weather with a slight breeze. The leaves on the tree in my backyard are turning a brilliant shade of gold and I could see a few fall from the branches to the ground. Truly, a perfect day.  Tears instantly filled my eyes as I thought about how beautiful and perfect the weather was. This would have been the best day for a walk. With my boy. I would have enjoyed and savored every moment as we strolled through our neighborhood, enjoying the sights and sounds and smells of fall. Feeling the breeze and sunshine on my face. This has always been my favorite time of year for walks. But I didn't go on one today. I haven't gone on one in a long time. It's not the same anymore. And it never will be ever again. That pain hit me like a ton of bricks today in the backyard. As I soaked in the beauty around me, basking in the perfect warmth of the sun....my thoughts ...

🎵BAH DEE YAH! SAY DO YOU REMEMBAH! BAH DEE YAH! DANCIN' IN SEPTEMBER!🎵 I'll never not post this song on this day....

Today was the first birthday I've celebrated without my sweet puppy dog. He has celebrated every single birthday with me since I turned 12 years old. He was always the first one I'd see in the morning and the last one I'd see at night. I'm also officially in my last year of my 20's. And it  SUCKS . It sucks because my dog is gone and doesn't get to be here with me in such a monumental year. It sucks because I never thought I'd be where I am now, a year shy of 30. I can't even believe I'm going to  be  30. That is like, a real grown up age. And I feel anything  but  "grown up." And it really, really sucks my dog won't be here for that milestone and all of the other milestones I'll have to experience without him. He was there for  so much  of my life, it feels wrong to "celebrate" anything without him. To be honest, I had a pretty good day. My family was really good to me as always. They made me laugh when I felt like cryi...