Save Myself

Song: Save Myself
Artist: Ed Sheeran

It's a terrible feeling when home doesn't feel like home anymore. When the place that used to always bring you a sense of safety and love feels empty and cold. When the things you once loved to do, the way you once thought, no longer holds even a flicker of light or meaning anymore. When life, that seemed so full of hope and opportunity at one time is now nothing more than a dark void of never ending heartache and loss.

Hopeless.

That's how I've been feeling. For forever it seems.

I have nothing new to say. I feel like a broken record. Nothing is ever going to change. I'll never be better than I am now. I have no desire to live. 

Music has been my best friend lately. I feel like I have my earbuds in 24/7. I've discovered some amazing new tunes that speak to my soul. That describe my exact feelings and emotions in the most perfect way. It's always so thrilling to me when I find a song like that; one that feels like it was written just for me.

Here's one of them....

I gave all my oxygen to people that could breathe
I gave away my money and now we don't even speak
I drove miles and miles but would you do the same for me
Oh, honestly?

Offered up my shoulder just for you to cry upon
Gave you constant shelter and a bed to keep you warm
They gave me the heartache and in return I gave a song
It goes on and on

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me, they just left me on the shelf, no farewell
So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself

I gave you all my energy and I took away your pain
Cause human beings are destined to radiate or drain
What line do we stand upon cause from here it looks the same?
And only scars remain

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
I drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me, they just left me on the shelf, no farewell
So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself

But if I don't then I'll go back to where I'm rescuing a stranger
Just because they needed saving, just like that
I'm here again, between the devil and the danger
But I guess it's just my nature
My dad was wrong, cause I'm not like my mum
Cause she'd just smile and I'm complaining in a song, but it helps

So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself

Life can get you down so I just numb the way it feels
Or drown it with a drink and out of date prescription pills
And all the ones that love me, they just left me on the shelf, no farewell
So before I save someone else, I've got to save myself
And before I blame someone else, I've got to save myself
And before I love someone else, I've got to love myself