Words Fail

Song: Words Fail

Artist: From, Dear Evan Hansen

 

I have to leave again. This time, it's mentally. I need to start helping myself. I need to stop wasting my time here. I need to stop pretending there's anyone out there who actually reads my blog. I need to stop hoping that there's someone who can relate to me. I need to give up distractions. Don't get me wrong, I love my blog! I love blogging about music. And right now, I'm only planning on taking a week long break. I just need to detox. I need time to meditate. I need to start trying. Trying to get help. Trying to overcome. Trying to move forward.

 

I'm done. I'm done repeating the same mistakes day after day, month after month, year after year. I'm done just saying things are going to change. That things are going to be different, better. I'm ready to actually make that happen. Make the change. Because words, well, words fail. That's all they are: just .... words. Words really mean nothing. It's action that makes things happen. It's time that I stop running away from what's true. It's time that I figure out how to step into the sun.

 

 

I never meant to make it such a mess
I never thought that it would go this far

So I just stand here sorry

Searching for something to say

Something to say

Words fail, words fail
There's nothing I can say

I guess I thought I could be part of this

I never had this kind of thing before

I never had that perfect girl

Who somehow could see the good part of me

I never had the dad who stuck it out

No corny jokes or baseball gloves

No mom who just was there

'Cause mom was all that she had to be

That's not a worthy explanation

I know there is none

Nothing can make sense of all these things I've done

Words fail, words fail
There's nothing I can say

Except sometimes, you see everything you wanted
And sometimes, you see everything you wish you had

And it's right there, right there, right there

In front of you

And you want to believe it's true

So you... make it true

And you think maybe everybody wants it

And needs it... a little bit... too

This was just a sad invention
It wasn't real, I know

But we were happy

I guess I couldn't let that go
I guess I couldn't give that up
I guess I wanted to believe
'Cause if I just believe
Then I don't have to see what's really there

No, I'd rather pretend I'm something better than
These broken parts
Pretend I'm something other than
This mess that I am
'Cause then I don't have to look at it
And no one gets to look at it
No, no one can really see

'Cause I've learned to slam on the brake
Before I even turn the key
Before I make the mistake
Before I lead with the worst of me
I never let them see the worst of me

'Cause what if everyone saw?
What if everyone knew?
Would they like what they saw?
Or would they hate it too?
Will I just keep on running away from what's true?

All I ever do is run
So how do I step in
Step into the sun?
Step into the sun